I dreamt that I lost everything. everything. It was wierd because I woke up in the state I had been in my dream-- crying uncontrollably, feeling lost and confused, the whole works. I am not sure what I am feeling right now, but I know that I wish I weren't feeling this. Last night I had a dream that my family, all of us, went on this water "vacation" thing where we got in something sort of like a sub (shaped like a circle) and went out into the water (it looked kind of like the wheel on those old granies that dips into the water and powers it, only it was a vessel). The thing was underwater the entire time and it moved by spinning about like a circle. Something happened, though, while we were down there. I don't know what went wrong, but I do know that (in the dream) I awoke and only my sister and I were left alive. Everyone else had perished. My mother, my father, my little brother (he is only 18), my grandmother and grandfather, even my dog had died. I remember something about all of us running around the wheel while it was under water, as though we had opened a hatch in the wheel and it had endangered everyone inside...I remember seeing the dog running about the wheel rather than floating in the water as he ought to have and trying to get back into the wheel. I think I also saw Scooby Doo, but I dont know why. Perhaps they had all beeng trying to get out, perhaps something was wrong and I made it out early enough, but I never saw my parents or my brother try to escape--i only saw those dogs. Everyone had drowned. I have an image, perhaps from how it all happened, of swimming through the murky, deep water searching for them, finding nothing. I feel as though there must have been some sort of horrible accident, as though other people must have died as well, but I was consumed by a feeling of LOSS. My sister and I had been given everything that was recovered from the wreck--some odds and ends, a few pieces of things like chalk and stuff that we had taken with us on the vacation. I just didn't know what to do. We put the things that were recovered back into the car/truck (i think it was my dad's Chevy) and then tried to figure out what to do next. EVeryone in the parking lot, which was like a big grassy area with trees by the lake (So an unpaved parking lot) was staring at us like they knew what happened, as though more had happened than we would ever know. As though something horrible had happened to other people as well. My sister and I went to talk to someone, the manager of the lake activity center we were at, to find out what was to be done now. the main office had military offices in it too, sort of like when you went into the PE building at USC, and there were office doors in the hallway that said USN or USAF or US ARMY on the door (They apparently had some summer ROTC training thing here). THe woman at the front directed us to the manager's office. We got lost once looking for it and then found it again (the door was almost hidden in the wall, I suppose to keep people without appointments or reasons for being there out. THe manager inside was getting a cup of coffee off a tray that this woman had that she was (i suppose) taking to all the offices. Poor intern. Also there was a guy who cam in and sat in the office next to my sister that wasn't with us but I think wanted to hear the talk. The woman started us off in prayer (She said she was unitarian)and when I bowed my head I began to cry (for the first time in my dream) and she just prayed. She then started showing "soothing" movies, I think to help me. I just couldn't handle the gravity of what had just happened. I grabbed my sister's hand at one point, which helped. SHe wasn't crying in the dream but I suppose she was trying to be the strong one. Everytime I started to regain control of myself I would think..."my dad and mom won't be at my wedding" or "my brother has died, what do I do?" The sense of loss, of being left alone in the world was devastating. I don't know what to do now. I woke up while I was crying in that office, holding my sister's hand. It was one of those moments that is touching and yet terrifying. I don't know what to do with it. _

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